Can I Offer You Some Feedback? - Episode #39

Show Notes:

In this new episode Sara is joined by Anna, program manager at Case Western Reserve University. She shares her change in perspective on feedback, based on her experiences. Her once immediate reaction to “bad news” turned to expanded understanding around feedback. Resulting in a flow of not only being the giver of feedback, but an open receiver. Subscribe to this podcast today and so you never miss an episode! 

Episode #39: Expanding Understanding Around Feedback

Sara: Welcome to, Can I Offer You Some Feedback? My name is Sara. And this is the podcast for those who have a complicated relationship with feedback and are looking to hear from real people across levels and industries with their ideas, perspectives, and best practices on feedback. Before we dive in, I'd like to introduce our guest for the podcast today, Sarah. She's an education and non-profit leader with a passion for student success. Welcome to the conversation today. 

Sarah: Thank you so much for having me. 

Sara: Excellent. Well, let's kick things off with the main question of the podcast. When I say the phrase, 'can I offer you some feedback?' What is your gut reaction when you hear that? 

Sarah: Anxiety. Definitely anxiety. And I just worry, what is coming at me? 

Sara: Yeah, the unknown of what that conversation is going to be. What they might say.

Sarah: Definitely unknown. Whether it's warranted or not. 

Sara: And that's part of the unknownness, right? You just don't know what we don't know. When you're thinking about feedback, do you prefer to be someone on the receiving end of feedback or the one who's giving feedback? 

Sarah: I definitely prefer to be on the giving end of feedback. I really want whether it's my team members, folks I'm working with to hear the good things that they're doing. So, when they have successes, hearing that from me and being able to celebrate that and then in the same measure, when there's something that needs to be fixed or could improve, being able to share that, I think that's very helpful. 

Sara: Excellent. When you're thinking then about tailoring or preparing that feedback for others, what do you think is some of the parts of meaningful feedback? How are you defining that? 

Sarah: I think meaningful feedback is well-timed and actionable. Depending on the context, feedback in the moment isn't always going to be received the best. And so for me, that meaningful feedback is in a place, a time, a format which will have the impact that I'm looking to make with my team or even with my students of what's going to help them improve, get better, consider an insight in a different way. 

Sara: It sounds like there's a lot of intentionality or thoughtfulness as you're preparing that and making sure it's in service of that person.

Sarah: Definitely. When I think as an educator, that's something that I really consider a lot of, is what I'm doing in service of that next goal of the purpose of why we're together of what we're doing. 

Sara: Excellent. Can you maybe help us see an example or share an experience of a time where you've seen or been the recipient of meaningful feedback? 

Sarah: Sure. I had an example and now it's lost in my head. But through the magic of podcasting editing, this will be much better in a moment. Yeah. So could you throw that to me again? 

Sara: Sure. Can you help us think or maybe talk through an example where you have either seen meaningful feedback delivered or maybe you've received it? 

Sarah: Sure. I would say early in my career, I was a new supervisor. Very new supervisor. I was almost peer age with the folks that I was supervising and I took a very intellectual approach to problems. I see the problem. We're going to find a solution. I'm going to tell you what to do. And that came off as very cold, a little clinical and it intimidated my staff. I got really helpful feedback. Feedback that I've carried with me the last 15-plus years from my supervisor to say, "Sarah, you may have the solution, but you need to consider how that feedback is delivered, especially when you're in a position of authority." 

And I hadn't seen myself in that way. I was just the person running this process and I needed to think about where I fall in positional authority or perceived authority to be able to get the results that I'm looking for. And how that's delivered is really impactful. And that was something that again, 15-plus years later, I think about frequently when I'm delivering feedback or when I'm trying to impact a change in a system, in a process with people. 

Sara: Yeah. And I think it's a real kind of subtle shift over time as that new manager where we think of having the solution and then eventually transitioning to, I have a solution. And I'd like to hear what yours is and that openness of like maybe I don't know everything, but that definitely takes time to transition to. 

Sarah: For sure. And I think that there's a pendulum on that as well is now that I'm well-practiced in my craft, the collaborative approach of seeking consensus comes much more naturally, but also when do you come to, "yes, okay, and this is our solution". So you've gathered consensus from everyone and now let's act. It's interesting to see how that changes over time and with professional growth, for sure. 

Sara: Yeah. And either inadvertently or explicitly getting feedback from the person that we're supervising about that as well. If I could grant you one wish for people doing one thing better regarding feedback, what might it be? 

Sarah: Give it. I think that that's kind of funny coming from someone who gets anxious anytime, someone who wants to give her feedback. But I think that there can be hesitancy to share with folks that feedback of sharing how they're doing, but also balancing to say, let's celebrate successes while also pinpointing what can change and what can improve. 

Sara: And that's definitely real, you know. The overcoming of that hesitancy and tying back to earlier how is it in service and how are we supporting that person? So definitely I see that connection. Well, for our last question together, Sarah, can I offer you some feedback?

Sarah: Absolutely. 

Sara: Excellent. Well, one of the things that I've been really grateful for over the many, many years that we've known each other either students or professionals working alongside each other or across the industry is I've really valued the thoughtfulness that you put into your feedback and the space in which you give to deliver it. In a way, sometimes I've found when you provide feedback, there is a calm spaciousness around, "there's something I've observed. Have you noticed that?" Like, it's a real casual coaching style that I think is really effective in being able to assess where that other person is with the information and taking time. You know, there's no rush. Giving the feedback faster isn't going to help it get better quicker. Like, we might need to sit in it. 

And I really appreciate not only the thoughtful delivery but the space that you create for folks to sit in it and to ponder and to marinate and to digest and to all the other verbs that are just really sitting with the content and the bigger scope of what's going on. So, I hope that comes up a lot in your day or and maybe others have also been beneficiaries of that. But I think that's something you really do fantastically. And I hope you're able to share that gift with others as well. 

Sarah: Well, thank you, Sara. Actually, that touches me very much. I appreciate you. 

Sara: My pleasure. Well, Sarah, thank you so much for taking the time to speak with me. And thanks to you for joining us in another episode of, Can I Offer You Some Feedback? You can reach me at podcast@mod.network. We would love to hear from you on your thoughts on feedback or any other perspectives you'd like to hear from next. As always, give us a quick rating on your platform of choice and share this podcast with a friend. And I'm hoping that tomorrow you take a chance and offer feedback when it's needed most.